{DangerDoes} Don’t Tell Me I’m Pretty

Don’t tell me I’m pretty

Don’t compare my face with the others that you have seen

Tell me I’m otherworldly and ethereal and beyond comprehension 

Tell me that what I think matters and that what I say has merit

Listen

Ask me what my opinion is on the book you just read or why I think Pluto should still be a planet 

Tell me a story that nobody else knows

Let me inside the vault of your mind and your heart that you keep closed

Tell me that the way I use words heals the hurts that run miles deep

Tell me my heart is full of compassion

Tell me that I matter and am brave even when I feel ready to sink

Tell me that my emotions are what make me strong

Tell me the truth when it’s hard, when I’m cruel and shouting and falling apart and blaming you for things that aren’t your fault

Tell me that I’m the one that makes you want to stay at home when the whole world is calling your name 

Don’t call me pretty,

tell me I’m enough and complete without you

but that you’d like to walk with me wherever I’m headed.

Two whole people,

who say so many things but don’t tell each other that they are pretty.

 

{DangerDoes} 4 letters, many words

It is going to get coffee and bringing back two
it’s words, it’s feeling, it’s comfortable silence, it’s loud laughter at midnight
It is commitment for the better, the sick, the haves and the nots.

It’s not just words spoken or things written on paper or empty promises forgotten on the back shelves of our minds
It’s a vow with a purpose, a goal with the end, to better not just yourself but each other in the world that we’re in
Working together, making more problems than solutions not a movie ending with the sunset in the distance.

It’s the keeping of promises, honor, respect, honest, and pure.

It is taking what you could give in pieces to many and refusing to break it up.

More and more, those four letters are strung together and thrown around like confetti. Noticing the mess it makes because it’s beautiful but a pain to pick up yet we keep throwing because it’s a celebration, even after heartbreak we find healing.

Scared of hurt and unsure of ourselves,
sometimes it’s a flower we refuse to pick and just leave growing.

It’s the way we wonder if we’re insane.

It’s the way it hurts to give on hard days. When you don’t want to but the commitment is made
It’s muddy and unclear and an uphill hike both ways, yet we treat it like the resolution to our problems, a magical elixir, a fairytale ending.

But it’s a beginning. The sunset brings a sunrise. The romance brings reality.

If one thing holds clarity it’s this to me that it is a problem maker, a multiplier of frustration and a battle to fight for.
It’s not our solution, it won’t heal our hearts.

All I can say about it is that

well,

l-o-v-e,

Love is a start.

 

{DangerDoes} Dear me, from me

Dear me,

read this, I hope you listen on repeat
to me,
from me,
hear me speak
please be wild and free
don’t say nothing, for to not speak is to speak
stand for what is right, look those things in the face
do not fear death
meet it with fire and grace
grasp that precious life
trust through the doubt, have faith to thrive through uncertainty
cry and grieve when you and others are hurting
mourn
be love and be loved and be okay with letting go when love isn’t the answer
press on
be called
let intentionality drown you and bring you back to life again
Let holy moments convince you of the places where the veil between runs thin
see all of the glory in them, see all the glory within
live fearlessly in His close embrace
live out that grace

from me

signed,

me

-{DD}

{DangerDoes} 27th

I almost went the whole day, I didnt even notice. & then I did.
It wouldve been four years today
spent with you
The 27th will never be an important day, it cant be/
I still (& I guess Ill always) remember the first moment
front of a store, I smiled because your shirt had a pun
& now I sit here tears falling
& think that way back then if I knew what I did now
I wouldve stopped at appreciating at your corny teeshirt
& let you go on//
whats worst is that while I sit here & cry you probably havent even thought about it. Not at all.
How do sweet moments turn into memories that are becoming grey & fading fast?
& not to be mean & not to be cruel but in retrospect I know Im happier sitting here crying than I would have been if I had stayed with you.
It doesnt make it easier & it doesnt mean I regret that time with you. It just means our time was over. It’s past tense.
This 27th was four, not anymore, but it would’ve been. But,
I am where I am & I am where I’m meant to be.

I’m happy–I’m me, & even with subsiding tears I truly believe, right here right now with every tear gone,

I’m moving on.

 

 

{DangerDoes} Four & Fourteen Months

{A poem of my heart thoughts over two dear people who passed four mouths & fourteen months ago}

 

Constant sorrow is my friend
Even when I tell it to go away it comes back again
& I find it impossible to turn a blind eye
From the way it speaks & the way it sighs
life wont give me a break
from this constant deep chest ache
Clinging and hoping I barely see the light
Knowing and believing seem so far apart
Winter oppresses and no birds are in flight
I try to think and sometimes, almost never
I go to that porch and sit by your window
and the sorrow seems forever–
Forever seems infinite and incomplete like walking forward into the past week after week
But life isnt bleak
it just seems dull
The sun shines and the birds harmonize
in the world you loved
finally turning back to green.
Life isn’t over it has just begun

but sorrow wont leave
it clings to this heart
but one day it wont seem so constant
or tear me apart